Smirnoff

So I have to tell you a little story about Baby Number 3.  

I am what you would call a pretty laid back kind of mum.  And, with each pregnancy I have become even more relaxed.  There are so many 'rules' you are meant to follow when you are pregnant.  Don't take drugs.  Don't smoke.  Don't drink alcohol.  Don't eat soft cheese or soft serve ice cream.  Don't eat ham.  Don't breathe in case you die ... 

So, anyway, I neither smoke nor take drugs.  But, I do have the odd drink of something alcoholic (I mean, come on, I already have 2 kids!!  Sometimes stronger fluids than water are required!).  

My first 2 pregnancies were entirely planned.  To the point of shagging endlessly for the 6 or 7 days on either side of ovulation (too much information?? LOL).  Both of them commenced with NEGATIVE pregnancy tests.  Followed by absolutely huge piss ups!!  And I mean really getting hammered.  A few days after each piss up, the positive tests were done, much to my horror.

Baby number 3 was a little bit of a surprise.  We initially thought, yeah .. let's have another baby.  We tried unsuccessfully for a couple of months before realising that we were most likely insane, and should reconsider.  That was cool, I wasn't pregnant.  We holidayed in Broome for 2 weeks, where I consumed a huge amount of Smirnoff vodka and beer.  Literally drinking every day.  I had not long finished breast feeding and was really well and truly letting my hair down.

Upon our return from Broome, after a couple of weeks, I decided to do a pregnancy test.  I didn't think I was pregnant at all, as I never have any symptoms of any kind.  Low and behold, OMG, I was pregnant.  No worries, I thought.  Holiday baby :)

I went to see my wonderful obstetrician.  I love that man.  He is something of a God, I am sure of it.  He whips out the sonograph machine, puts it on my then much smaller belly, and says, "WHOA!  Big baby!!"  Then he paused ... then, "hang on ... not big, just big for the dates you have given me!!"

It appears Baby Number 3 was not a holiday baby after all.  Baby number 3 was in fact conceived BEFORE our winter break.  I thought of all the vodka I drank.  I told my ob gyn.  He laughed.  Then he reassured me.  Then I named our number 3 Smirnoff (only in womb mind you).